The Power of Wait

Once you have worked with me for a while, you will learn that I tend to respond promptly. We all have our communication styles that work for us. For me, closing off a communication loop is an important one. If I have not called someone back, or replied to a text or email, I tend to get a bit agitated. So, for that reason it’s easier for me to respond.

Because I am pretty good with calling people back, when I forget to respond, which does happen, I am usually treated reasonably well.

But because I respond this way, I tend to miss out on ‘The Power of Wait’.

Just yesterday there were some emails flying around about some advertising pricing. Once I get cc’d into emails about advertising pricing it means someone is getting upset, and my (over)sensitive ‘staff satisfaction’ radar goes up. I am desperate to wade into the fray. I decided no, this doesn’t need me, and the situation was beautifully resolved.

There are a number of salespeople that I work with that use ‘The Power of Wait’ extremely effectively in negotiations. I am also hopeless at this strategy unless I am really being very conscious and deliberate in its usage – for the same reason as above. I feel very uncomfortable leaving a communication loop unclosed. Chris Voss talks about slowing down a negotiation in his must-read book Never Split the Difference. Some people seem natural at this and I recall recently asking a colleague how it was going with one tricky party in a negotiation. “I am leaving him on ice for a couple of days” was the response. And yes, she got the deal done.

What I really like about giving things time is that often this allows the dust to settle and thoughts to realign. There is always the chance that the motivation and momentum is lost, and generally we need to work fast and deal with negotiations promptly. However, waiting things out is a great de-escalation strategy in some cases.