The Importance of Identity Alignment

This post is about you, not me… 

But it’s going to start with a little bit about me. 

I made a call at the end of last year which had a profound and unexpected impact on my identity. 

I made a decision to give up a bit of this and take on a bit of that and merge Independent Agent with eXp, which involved a surrendering of my business in the form it was in.

While still a business owner and carrying a lot of weight, my role changed and whilst still a director I also became an employee of a very large, very distributed, NASDAQ listed company.

I was not a ‘business owner’ in the same sense that I was. I had less control, less say, but I still had still so much on the line. I also know that there would be a way for me to have an impact, and to have a say, but I had not found it yet. I had to learn where I could fit and where I did not fit. 

I had to find myself again.

Bit by bit this wore me down, and I found myself in a state of uncertainty about who I was and what my purpose was because my identity was tied up in ‘founder and owner’ of Independent Agent. All of the very good reasons for making the decision didn’t seem like good decisions in retrospect.

Fortunately, this is resolved. Sometimes the only way is through. I have figured out my way and where and how I fit. I have developed a work cadence that suits ‘me and them’, and an identity that aligns with what I value and who I am.

Now, it’s time to talk about you. 

I have recently spoken with a couple of agents who have joined us here at eXp. They speak of not fitting in at the office they have left. Once they did but things changed somewhere along the way. They speak about hearing ‘no’ more than ‘give it a go’ and a lot about conforming to something they really don’t want to conform to. 

When I speak to them, it very much sounded like how I had been feeling for the past 6 months or so, but their lack of ‘connect’ has been going on for considerably longer.  

I am not saying that a new way of working is going to work for everyone. Nor am I saying that if you are disconnected that the shift in working and thinking that we are proponents of is going to be the answer. 

In fact, someone from our team may even be reading this and thinking that a remote working model is not working for them.

That is fine too. 

If you are disconnected, and your identity is not matching what you are doing and where you are, it may well be worth taking a moment to consider what is actually causing that disconnection. Taking the time to figure out what it is that you are really needing is going to have a huge impact for you not only in the near future, but years down the track as well.